Tuesday, August 12, 2014

Help! I've Fallen, and I Can't Get Up!!!

If you go on YouTube and search for “Funny Falls,” you will get many thousands of choices.  They even have them categorized by years such as “Funny Falls - 2012, Funny Falls - 2013, etc.!!!  If you click on one or two, you can’t help but chuckle or sometimes downright LAUGH!!!
Thank goodness there will not be another upload tonight of my fall.

I’m walking with a purpose toward the office with Mr. Roberts.  We are briskly strolling the halls of education headed toward the office which requires going through the cafeteria.  The camera shows me turning and pointing to something or someone on my right.  I notice in front of me the YELLOW HAZARDOUS warning sign indicating a middle school spill zone!!!  I continue my vitally important data-based conversation with my colleague as I maneuver to my left to totally avoid the hazardous spill water.  Little did I know, the spill extended about 9 miles to the left of the sign.  The video only shows my right arm flailing helplessly through the air as my school-colored flip-flops fail me.  (Alliteration!!!) 

Mr. Roberts stated that all he knew was that one minute I was there talking…….the next minute I was gone.  Of course, the cafeteria couldn't be empty at that moment..Oh, NO!!!!!  The entire 5th grade student body, one assistant principal, the ISS teacher, the SRO, and a central office supervisor all got to watch as I thudded to the ground.  But that wasn't the best part.

The water decided to take on a life of its own and creep between my foot and my school-colored flip-flop.  My butt was wet.  My legs were wet.  My feet were wet.  My flip-flops were wet.  And there was absolutely no way I was going to get any traction AT ALL.  I couldn't get up.  It was like a really bad comedy routine..me trying to get to my feet.  It took two cranes teachers to come to my rescue and help me to dry land.  I assessed the damage and realized……OMG.this old woman didn't break her hip!!!!

It suddenly occurred to me that during the 6 hours and 14 minutes that it took me to completely fall, bounce, flounder, and get up…….the entire 5th grade student body had done nothing.  They didn't laugh.  They didn't snicker.  They didn't clap.  They just looked at me.  Some were in wonder.  Some were sad for me.  Some looked worried.  But all were just…………respectfully concerned?!?!?!?!  I WAS SO PROUD!!!  So I did what was absolutely necessary.  I took a bow. 


So they finally clapped when they realized I was alive and well, that no sink hole was formed in the cafeteria that might affect Friday’s dance, and that life would go on.  What a great group - my fans!!!


I sent an email to the entire faculty suggesting lesson plans on Richter scales for science and similes for language arts  (Please write a 9 page essay explaining this simile:  Mrs. Hensley flopped like a fish out of water when she fell.) 
(Our science teacher indicated the Hawkins County Seismic Monitor did not pick up the Earth vibration at that moment - and similes were not on the pacing guide) 

All is well. 

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